flashiness, a form of over-writing, when the writer chooses words that draw attention away from the story’s content and to themselves. We cannot forget that we are reading. Revise by toning down the narrative voice.
NO: The car purred and growled and caterwauled and, with a screech, shredded the outer three millimeters of high grade rubber across a swath of Flanders Street as it took off like a demon cat.
YES: Uncle Jimmy’s Subaru idled in a cloud of exhaust. When I gave him a whistle, he revved it one last time—the engine made a predatory growl—and then took off down Flanders Street, leaving a layer of high-test rubber on the pavement and the smell of burned hair.
***Until April 12, the official release date of “The Editor’s Lexicon: Essential Writing Terms for Novelists,” I will be posting one definition a day here. Check back often! Read more about the book here.
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